Ding dong merrily on high, fa-la-la-la-la-laaaa-la

[r_vecchio]

Dear Santa... Dear Santa, This year I've been busy! In November ynez_castillo and I robbed a bank (-50 points). In April I caught a purse-snatcher who stole will_porter's purse (30 points). In June I gave in_a_chinashop a wet willie, then I took it back (-5 points). In August I bought porn for ray__k (-10 points). Last month I stole onewingbloody's purse (-30 points). Overall, I've been naughty (-65 points). For Christmas I deserve a lump of coal! Sincerely, r_vecchio

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Coal? But I bought Kowalski porn... why's that a negative??

Comments

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

I see...

So, really, how did this save Christmas?

Why can't you drugs-test Santa? There's no law against it, as far as I know.

Nothing. Just, God, please, forget I said it.

I'll work with that.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

I'm getting there!! You have to let me tell the story my own way!

It's disrespectful to drug test him, Ray. If you'd have met him, you wouldn't have even thought about it. He just had a way about him.

Oh Ray. I feel so helpless. I wish there were something I could do to make you feel better.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Okay, sorry. Please continue...

He's Santa! The only way he could make it round the world and stay awake is if he's sniffing something. And now I plan to find out what it is...

Yeah. There's nothing so...there's just nothing.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Ouch. Fine. I hear you.

It's magic. It was the amulet. He had to get it back because that's what gives him the power to make Christmas.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, Ynez but I just, I don't wanna talk about it.

Santa uses an amulet to make Christmas happen?

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Okay. I'm sorry.

He does. To make all the toys and get them delivered. To make the reaindeer fly. The whole thing. Without that amulet, no Christmas.

Agent Mulder and I saved Christmas. I could call Mr. Kringler and put in a good word for you.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

So am I. But I really hate it when you feel like you gotta apologize, 'cause you really don't need to.

So it's not only kids who get presents from Santa? Wow. And, y'know, if you wanna call him and tell him I've been good, then I'd be cool with that...

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

I feel bad for you. That's all.

I'll just do that, then. He'll figure out what you need for Christmas.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Okay, well, try not to, yeah? 'Cause I don't wanna make you feel bad.

Toy train set. Uh, yeah, I'm sure he'll find something that I want.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

I know you don't. I just don't like it that you're hurting. But I understand.

Anything else? I'm sure he will.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Make-up set, LEGO, dress up Barbie, Action Man! Uh, coloring set and I'll let you know anything else I think of...

Can Santa read minds?

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Make up set? Dress up Barbie? Is there something you need to tell me, Ray?

I think so, yes.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

That I'm a big kid at heart? ...who likes girly games? Oh, Christ.

Uh oh.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

You said it.

Have you been naughty or nice?

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Don't tell anyone.

A lot little bit of both. How 'bout you?

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Your secrets are always safe with me, Ray. You might want to mention this one to your shrink, though.

Mostly nice, I think. I don't know for sure.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

I tell that to Dinosaur Guy and chances are it'll give him heart failure.

Nice, more than nice. Definitely more than nice. How can you not know for sure?

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

How are those meetings with him going?

I don't know. I just don't. I don't feel very nice, but I'm not sure I feel naughty.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

He fries my brain right in front of me. Not surprisingly, it hurts.

I don't think you're naughty so don't worry. From what I heard, Santa seems like a nice enough guy so he'll bring you what you really want.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Poor Ray. I don't think I'd like that, either. So it isn't helping? Or is it too soon to say? It's probably too soon.

I hope he does. That means he could figure it out.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

I got my third session early next week so.. I dunno if it's working. I don't really see what I should be getting outta it.

'Cause you can't figure it out yourself?

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

It's too early to tell anything if you've only had two sessions. What do you want to get out of it?

Something like that.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

My gun.

Then I hope he brings you whatever he figures you want.

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

That's a very concrete goal.

Me too.

[locked from Kowalski]

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it is. Got plenty of those.

Hey, uh...y'know what I figure? Kowalski's not that bad a guy.