Ding dong merrily on high, fa-la-la-la-la-laaaa-la

[r_vecchio]

Dear Santa... Dear Santa, This year I've been busy! In November ynez_castillo and I robbed a bank (-50 points). In April I caught a purse-snatcher who stole will_porter's purse (30 points). In June I gave in_a_chinashop a wet willie, then I took it back (-5 points). In August I bought porn for ray__k (-10 points). Last month I stole onewingbloody's purse (-30 points). Overall, I've been naughty (-65 points). For Christmas I deserve a lump of coal! Sincerely, r_vecchio

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Coal? But I bought Kowalski porn... why's that a negative??

Comments

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

Now I know why you wanted to come for Thanksgiving.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

To share the spoils? Or hide from the cops?

[ynez-castillo.livejournal.com]

So we could rob a bank! Pay attention to the meme!

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Oh! Past tense... so I wrote this after Thanksgiving. I see.

Yeah, so, which bank we hitting?

[in-a-chinashop.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, you gave me what?

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

A wet willie... I took it back!

[in-a-chinashop.livejournal.com]

I don't know if that makes it better or worse...

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

It was only my finger, Ren. Chill out.

Can't it make it both? But in different ways?

[http://users.livejournal.com/_classact_/]

Well if you're gonna be that stupidly honest, then maybe you deserve the coal...

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Dear Asher,

Told you: burden.

But I'm guessing you're not gonna be writing to Santa any time soon, so you can have my coal.

With love and merriment,

Ray

[http://users.livejournal.com/_classact_/]

I'm allergic to merriment....

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Well, I wasn't about to write 'hugs' was I?

How 'bout cheer?

[onewingbloody.livejournal.com]

I'd like my purse back, please.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Okay, but I warn you, it's empty.

Gimme a banana.

[onewingbloody.livejournal.com]

...did you take my chewing gum?

That can be arranged, monkey. You want a complimentary zoo cell with that?

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Uh, yeah. I think there's one piece left though. Wait, no, I had that already. Gee, sorry. You shoulda said something before.

Ooh, complimentary? It'd be rude not to. Lead the way, zoo keeper.

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

Man, you're a good cop! Um, but my lipstick was missing from my purse...

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

I am, thank you! And yeah, uh, I wouldn't have a clue about the lipstick...

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

Mmm hmm...

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

I don't! *sniff*

I'm more worried about why you, a guy, had a purse in the first place...

Re: So Long!

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

...huh?

[ray--k.livejournal.com]

I think porn is a good thing. I think you'd get great presents for buying me porn.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Yeah, you would've thought so, wouldn't you. Guess Santa isn't the kinky type.

Great, so porn from me, what do I get from you?

[ray--k.livejournal.com]

Uh... porn in exchange? That sounds festive to me. A porn exchange.