Savor the mental images (from will_porter)

[r_vecchio]

If you saw ME in a police car, what would you think I got arrested for? Answer me, then post to your own journal and see how many crimes you get accused of.

Taking my job into account, let's pretend you've seen me in the back of the car. Wearing cuffs. Raunchy, I know.

Comments

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Yeah...well... Don't expect it every day. I'm a guy, I don't do mushy.

[chicagomountie.livejournal.com]

Oh, don't worry, I make certain not to expect too much of anything from you on a daily basis, Ray.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_classact_/]

He not putting out for you, either, Mountie?

Canadians have needs, too, Vecchio.

[chicagomountie.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, I'm not following-- what precisely would Ray be putting outside for me? I don't have any house plants, much to my regret ...

[http://users.livejournal.com/_classact_/]

... Wow.

You're lucky you're pretty.

[chicagomountie.livejournal.com]

Well, thank you kindly, and I do consider myself fortunate, yes. I'm told I take after my mother in appearance.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_classact_/]

No shit? Is the obliviousness inherited, too? Seems unlikely... If either of your parents thought plants when someone mentioned putting out, then I'm not sure you'd exist.

[chicagomountie.livejournal.com]

The opportunity to ask them while they were alive never did seem to present itself, not that it ever occurred to me to do so. I'm sure you're more than capable of enlightening me on the meaning of the phrase, however.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_classact_/]

Completely capable. I'm just not sure Ray would appreciate it.

[chicagomountie.livejournal.com]

Ah. Because he'd prefer to do it, perhaps?

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Oh my God, shut up!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_classact_/]

What'd I do?

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

You're fucking with me again. Oh God...and now you've made the Mountie think.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_classact_/]

You're fuckable. Said it yourself. I think Red wants to test that, he just doesn't know it yet.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

I do not need you to matchmake for me.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_classact_/]

Great, because I'm not trying to.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah? Then what the fuck are you doing insinuating what you're insinuating?

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Good! ...Wait...what? Why not?

And don't listen to a word that guy is saying. He's just bleached his head one too many times, okay.

[chicagomountie.livejournal.com]

I already have your complete trust and support, Ray. What more could I possibly ask for?

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

You have my complete trust and support as long as we're not locked in a vault, lost in the wilderness, climbing up the outside of the Council Chambers or during countless other death defying stunts you like to pull.

[chicagomountie.livejournal.com]

They weren't stunts, Ray. They were reasonable actions undertaken in the course of performing our duty as officers of the law. Are you saying you don't trust me?

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

I'm saying I'm not having this conversation with you again, not today.

[chicagomountie.livejournal.com]

Ah.

[r-vecchio.livejournal.com]

Don't ah me.

[chicagomountie.livejournal.com]

I didn't 'ah' you. I was merely indicating that I understood that you appeared to be frustrated for some reason with my current line of inquiry.